Derriere Exerciser

Christopher Cooper Patently Absurd

I am sure all you ladies in your ‘Butt Booster’ pantyhose will be delighted to know that you are exercising your derrieres. In his book Patently Absurd, Christopher Cooper lists a collection of the most absurd patents granted by the United States Patent Office. It includes this patent, granted in 1982, for a "Derriere exerciser". This marvellous invention "Separates the buttocks by means of the strip (14) and lifts them by means of the panels (16 and 18) into an ‘unnatural’ position by means of the crossed bands. The muscles try to assume their natural position, resulting in automatic isometric exercise of which the wearer is unconscious."

Apart from the Velcro straps for adjusting it, it appears to be identical with the various brands of butt booster pantyhose introduced not long afterwards. Perhaps if he had tried to sell it to the hosiery industry, instead of the exercise industry, he would have made his fortune.

And have you noticed how much fitter you are as a result of all the exercise your pantyhose are giving you?


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